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Check out our June Newsletter. Find information on how to support a friend with cancer, a yummy recipe, and more!

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I Wouldn’t Go Back to me without Cancer

 

Before I had cancer I had no idea

How precious this life is

How fragile and fleeting

That all for some cells not behaving themselves

Can be snuffed out and finished

Like blowing a match

 

Before I had cancer I had no idea

How people can rally

And gather around you

Compassion, encouragement, meals and prayer,

Fresh food from the garden

Surrounded by care

 

Before I had cancer I had no idea

What strength lay within me

Deposit of power

Available now as much as I need

To  find in the battle

My peace and my joy

 

Before I had cancer I had no idea

How deeply involved

In each other we are

The sweet bonds of love binding us all together

A glimpse of God’s heaven

Right here on earth

 

Don’t take it for granted, you’re not here for ever

This beautiful world

And the wonder of life

Cancer has shown me just how great my love is

I can only be grateful

And never look back

Another piece by Lynette. Has your experience with cancer inspired you to write?  Post your comments.

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MyLifeLine.org created a tip sheet on how to Help a Friend with Cancer.

Download the tip sheet.

Post comments below on actions you have taken to help a friend with cancer.

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By Marcia Donziger, our Founder and Executive Director

I was 27 and thought I had a bladder infection.  Turned out to be a tumor on my right ovary. 

At first, my gynecologist was not concerned. 

“Could it be cancer?” I worried. 

“No”, she replied, “You’re too young to have cancer.”

I was married and trying to get pregnant at the time, so I scheduled surgery immediately to get it over with.  The doctor assured me the worst that could happen is I’d lose one ovary, and still be able to have children.  She was confident the tumor was benign.

On surgery day, I was wheeled into the pre-op room.  That’s when the medical assistant approached me with a legal form to sign, agreeing to the potential of having a hysterectomy.  My doctor and I never discussed this.

Five hours later, the surgery was over, and I was in the recovery room.  My body thrashed around in pain, and I still felt knives stabbing throughout my stomach and back.

That’s when my doctor broke the news. “I’m sorry, but you have Ovarian Cancer.  We had to do a complete Hysterectomy.”

Through the pain, I heard, “You have cancer.  You can’t have children.” 

The irony was that my doctor was six months pregnant.  Her belly at my eye level felt like multiple stabs in the heart.

Stage 3c Ovarian Cancer spread throughout my abdomen.  Infertility.  Followed by a bowel obstruction.  And six months of chemotherapy. 

One of things I struggled with most was keeping friends and family up-to-date with what was going on.  I felt the daily burden of not communicating effectively with those I loved who were so concerned. 

In 2007, I founded MyLifeLine.org to help all cancer patients and caregivers easily communicate with friends and family during the treatment process.  MyLifeLine.org Cancer Foundation believes a strong support community is critical for cancer patients.  We provide free, personal websites to cancer patients and caregivers to easily connect with family and friends, because no patient should ever feel alone. Learn more at www.mylifeline.org.

I would love to hear how an experience you’ve had with cancer inspired you to do something in the fight against cancer. Please share your comments.

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Today we announce the first version of the mobile optimized website. If you have a smart phone, you can view some of the main features from your phone. With a mobile optimized version, we hope that patients and caregivers can access thier website on the go and make updates even if they don’t have access to a computer.

My Updates: Patients and Caregivers can add new My Updates and friends and family can view and comment on the udpates.

Guest Messages: Friends and family can leave inspiring messages  and the patient can read all the loving messages without having to get on their computer to catch up.

Helping Calendar: Patients and caregivers can add and edit events on the Helping Calendar. As well, as friends and family can sign up to help.

Photo Gallery: The photo gallery is viewable from a smartphone, but with this version, you won’t be able to upload a photo directly to the photo gallery.

 See below for a few screen shots from the mobile version. Tell someone you know with cancer about MyLifeLine.org today.

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There are many ways you can help a friend with cancer. I found this great piece on the Fresh Brewed Life, “ 15 Ways to Really Help a Friend with Cancer”. It mentions practical things you can do for a friend with cancer, like laundry or suggesting a “date” for your spouses because the spouse of a person with cancer is often neglected. Don’t forget about their children or spouse, offer to do fun and supportive things for them as well. Think outside of the box when trying to find ways to help your friend with cancer. Instead of baking them another lasagna, ask them what their favorite restaurant is and deliver their favorite meal with a DVD for a nice, relaxing  night in.

 In this article from Women’s Health Magazine a survivor speaks candidly about what not to do or say for a friend with cancer.

 If you know of other great tips, please comment below!

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Part 2 of our Summary of Caregiving for Your Loved One with Cancer from CancerCare

In Part 1 I we reviewed the basic tips for caregivers. Part 2 is about long distance caregiving and taking care of yourself as a caregiver.

Don’t stress if your loved one is thousands of miles away. You can still be an integral part of their caregiving team.

Long Distance Caregiving:

  • Focus on what you can do. For example, schedule appointments, pay bills online, set up a personal website for them.
  • Make the most of your visits and try to schedule some visits during the week, so you can meet the appropriate doctors, etc. Plan some visits when your loved one has appointments scheduled.
  • Meet your loved ones neighbors when you visit, so they can check in on them and be your eyes and ears, when you’re gone.
  • Ask your loved ones local friends to help with tasks you can’t do from far way.

One of the most important things to remember is to take care of yourself as well.

Taking Care of Yourself

            Stay Healthy

  • Take time to exercise and keep yourself healthy.
  • Remember healthy eating habits. Pack healthy snacks for long hospital visits.
  • SLEEP!
  • REST! Practice deep breathing, mediation, and gentle stretching to decrease stress.
  • Don’t neglect your own check ups, screenings, and medications.

Getting Emotional Support

  • Allow yourself to take a break once in a while. Listen to music, or go on a quiet walk.
  • Be aware of your limits. You’re allowed to say no if you are over extended.
  • Journal your thoughts.
    • Don’t be afraid to ask other friends or family members for help. Keeping open lines of communication is best.
    • Visit with a mental health professional if you’re having bad feelings or worrying.
    • Seek out a support group for caregivers.
    • Don’t be too hard on yourself. Be realistic about how you can and cannot provide caregiving duties.

Lastly, here are some important final thoughts from the article on cargiving for your loved one.

  • Provide a way for other family members and friends to help. Set up a website at www.mylifeline.org to post visiting hours, meal delivery schedules, transportation needs, etc…(this isn’t mentioned in the article, but I thought I’d add it in!)
  • Check out respite care programs. If you need to run errands and can’t be with your loved one, you could schedule a respite caregiver.
  • Know your rights. Talk with your employer about what your options are for a leave of absence.
  • Call CancerCare ®  

Visit CancerCare’s Care Giver Support Page for more information.

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When we created MyLifeLine.org, we wanted to help patients with the emotional part of their cancer by allowing their friends and family to be there for them.  Through website posts, helping calendars and most importantly encouraging words from loved ones, we’ve brought patient support groups into their home and hospital rooms.

We are working hard to make this experience even better with more medical resources, fundraising tips, and support information for friends and family. With Facebook and Twitter posts, emails and blogs we are making MyLifeLine.org a smaller community no matter the number of members. MyLifeLine.org is a resource for anyone going through cancer or anyone who knows someone with this awful disease. We want to hear from you and want you to help make MyLifeline.org part of your community.

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  1. You won’t have to repeat your diagnosis, treatment plan, or treatment updates over and over.  You can post once, for everyone to read.
  2. You can ask for help with meals, rides, chores…. The possibilities are endless. Friends are always looking for ways to help.
  3. You’ll receive caring, loving messages from all of your friends.
  4. Your support network will grow larger than you ever imagined.
  5. You’ll feel connected to friends and family even if they’re thousands of miles away.
  6. You won’t have to keep up with long email chains or spend hours returning emails.

Get started today with your free website. Or tell a friend who was just recently diagnosed.

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